The 6th track on “Black Ball” is “Pushed”. It’s about a relationship that has gone beyond the point of fixing. Life experience has shown me that rarely is a strong breach in a relationship just one person’s fault. It is usually the fault of two or more people involved. And too often when there are long-standing issues between people, a void happens. The warmth of the relationship is lost and it can feel like your lost in outer space floating grasping for something stable to hold onto. “There is a void between us, made by our own reckless hands…”
There is a well-known phrase, “you push me away”, which is pretty common thing for hurt people to do to each other. Sometimes there is one person who tries to keep reaching out, but after awhile they just give up. Why try any longer if the other person won’t give a little too? This lack of reciprocity makes it hard to pursue relationships. I’m the type of person who will try for awhile, but if my efforts are ignored, I’ll “push me away too”. When I was writing the song, I was envisioning an argument where there were words back and forth. With every phrase spoken, the space between the people, who started out close, got farther and farther apart through the push and shove of their words.
It is sad when something that starts out beautifully turns into something broken. Sometimes the broken is able to be mended, but sometimes it is not fixable. The space is closed only when both people are ready to stop flinging the blame at each other and remember what is important- that other person. “With all the space between us, we lost the start/We couldn’t find each other for bleeding hearts”.